Jakobs Journal

May 2, 2010…yummy


Friggin boogers. No biggie if they’re in a tissue and I don’t have to see them. Watching one get pulled out of a nose and placed directly into the mouth where it is then chewed and occasionally sucked on, different story.

I hate boogers. My stomach turns just thinking about them. So frickin gross. It’s safe to say that I have an issue. An issue that I need to get worked out because I am more than well aware of the fact that the longer I react to it, the longer it will go on.

A couple funny stories…

Jakob was in the playroom with someone who doesn’t mind boogers. I was watching through the observation window and talking to a beloved volunteer about boogers. Jakob began digging. I continued to rant about how disgusting I found this entire process. The person in the playroom was totally cool with it, getting excited that he even touched the tissue. I, on the outside, cringed and cussed. The digging and eating continued. I said to my friend, “I wonder why he keeps at it…do ya think he’s sensing my reaction through the wall and that’s why he keeps going?” Maybe. So, I went upstairs. And guess what? As soon as I was gone, he stopped. Little Booger.

And then…

We’re all tucked in and ready to fall asleep. Jakob stays in my room most nights, he likes to stick his nice cold toes right into my sides all night long. It’s fun for everybody. Anyway, the room was silent when I heard a noise I easily recognized. Oh yeah, he was doing it In bed. I heard the chewing sounds and my stomach turned. Half joking, half serious, I said, “cut it out”.

“No cut it out,” he declared.

“Keep it up and you’ll be sleeping in your room without me,” I retorted.

“No bye-bye mom…”

No bye-bye mom. He said it so sweetly, I had to smile. In the middle of my revulsion, I grinned a little…partly because he was so cute and partly because we had just had a conversation.

And I remembered a story a guy told me recently about himself. He was a booger-eating kid too. He ate his boogers because he thought they were brain cells and he didn’t wanna lose any. He figured if he kept all the brain cells he possibly could, he’d be the smartest guy around. Now he’s no award-winning scholar these days but who knows where he’d be had he behaved any differently.

So I’m gonna do my best to just be ok with whatever Jakob does. I don’t expect him to change in any way to make me happy. Not his job. I’m the one with the issue to get over, not him. I’m the one allowing a little hardened snot to make me cranky, irritable, unable to fall asleep. It’s my deal and time for me to deal with it.

Amazing where I learn life lessons about taking responsibility for my own feelings. Of all places, boogers.

And as I learn my lesson and grow as a person, I will be sure to always offer him a tissue…yeah, definitely.